Lifecruiser

Mrs Lifecruiser is crazy, you already know that yes. But do you also know that she is a petoholic?

Wherever we go she just can’t resist all the pets, want to take them with her home. I strongly suspect that it’s her hiding the elephant mentioned in the earlier post. I wouldn’t be surprised at all.

I’m sure she has pets hidden every where.

You know how it works, all the denial, accusing others for the same thing they are doing etc. She is accusing me for the pets. That’s a strong sign.

Always the same promise: “This is the last one, I swear. I need just this little one, then I can stop.”

There have been two last ones in a short time now.

Cat Stevens:

The rabbit Agnes:

She is gettting deeper and deeper in the petoholic swamp, it’s a sad sight. It’s just a matter of time before she hang around with the other petoholics around the pet store, waiting for them to open.

Or even worse, stealing pets out on the street. I have to keep an eye on her all the time.

Any advice of what I shall do with her?

We suspect that we may have one more pet, but he is keeping himself hidden somewhere.

Any one who has seen our elephant…?

He has left some trace after his wild party:

And no, Mr Lifecruiser didn’t leave it there ;-)

Pheeeew, we can relax again, Basil is found, safe and sound.

I suddenly spotted him up in the roof over my computer and I shouted happily to Mr Lifecruiser: Basil! He is back again!

We suddenly got very excited and happy. Now we can’t stop talking to him all the time, even whistle for him to come.

Of course he doesn’t but it’s nice anyway…

Loose some win some, seems to be our saying about our pets.

Recently we lost our beloved pet Dusty and now we are afraid that maybe our net pet Basil has gone the same way, because we haven’t seen him for a while now.

Then we have some other pets, that Mr Lifecruiser won at some amusement parks. He is very good at aiming things and he is very determent, so he usually wins something.

Let us introduce them to you.

The Shark 1 and 2:

They have som unusual colors to be sharks, turquose and silver grey, really fancy, but of course, they are old moviestars now and have to have some glamour. They are lurking under our witing desk all the time. Better to watch out, you’ll never know when the shark attack is coming!!!

The Zebra “Roger Pontare”:

Named after a swedish artist that is known for his hairstyles, because he has a similar hair as him. Maybe they are relatives…? This one doesn’t sing though and we’re very grateful for that!

The giant panda Orvar:

Our biggest baby. He likes to sit in front of my computer and get mad at me when I won’t let him. He just sit at the bed staring angry at me for hours and hours!

Oooooh, by the way: They don’t want to go out in this winter weather either….

With a major grief in our hearts, we have to announce that one of our other pets has gone to heaven.

He had been with us for a long time now and has been a good pet, nothing bad can be said about him. He had a quiet personality and kept for himself in the corners mostly.

He was rather grey and soft. Ok, he had kind of a bad hairday every day, but that was just cute…

I can feel the tears in my eyes now, remembering the good times with him.

In memoriam for Dusty, our beloved friend:

Our friendship was like a sneeze
We couldn’t hold it
Smell it
Taste it
or know it’s coming
But we could always feel it
under our feet
It did come and go
but we always knew it’ll always be back

* Poem originally by Terri Fanning, rewritten by Lifecruiser

Death cause: Eaten alive by our other pet, the evil dustbuster, which we are NOT going to show here, because he is so horrifying so we keep him hidden in the closet and hardly ever let him out. We just can’t handle him.

Let us introduce our new pet Basil. He came to our home for about a week ago. He just sort of moved in, I suppose he really likes us.

He is dark and handsome, always want to be in the heat of the stage lights, running around a lot, seems a little bit restless and is climbing the walls all the time. He even goes to the roof, over what we do not know. That is how he got his name, after the nervous wreck Basil in Fawlty Towers.

We do not think that it is something we do that is making him upset, because he is very social and wants to be around us all the time, moving from room to room along with us.

Except from today when he seems to be in play mood, he is playing hide and seek with us.

He lived in the bathroom for the first week, just to make sure that he was house-trained properly before we let him out in the rest of our apartment. He only left one stack after him in there.

He has similar interests as us, he likes to be out on the net very often.

I am sure that we have a lot of food for him, but I tell you this:

- If he gets too big, fat and disguisting we will kill him instantly on the spot. There are always some other pet to get instead.

We do not know what species he is though, so lets just say spider.

Let us introduce you to one of our many PETS. This pet is a very very bad boy.

He humped Mr Lifecruisers leg one morning in the kitchen, obvious craving for some pet-thing… Luckily I heard Mr Lifecruisers scream for help and rescued him.

We suppose that it happened because he had a wild party all night long with a lot of his petbuddys, suffering from a bad hang over and - obviously - a lack of girls at the party.

There was his petbuddys, totally beaten by all the drinks, laying all over the floor, none of them were possible to talk any sense to. As usual, he only have buddys like that.

We are very concern about where he is going. *shaking our heads like every concerned parent would do*

Say Hello to Harry Petter caught at the very act:

OK, it might not be the best shot we taken, but how easy is it to take the picture when Mr Lifecruiser is shaking his leg all the time to get rid of the humping pet…?

This is a very special pet and he is rather demanding, we have to watch him all the time, he is always up to something. Come to think about it, maybe he is influenced by me…? *scary thought*

Once when we were in Scotland riding The Jacobite steam train, he was totally freaking out of control. He had set in his mind to step up on the roof on the train and was humping Mr Lifecruisers leg again!

OK, Mr Lifecruiser was on his way up on the roof too, but hey, there is a difference between them. I think….

So, there was Mr Lifecruiser, hanging out of the train halfway up on the roof, Harry Petter humping his leg as hard as he could, screaming about justice and me humping (?!) Mr Lifecruisers other leg, desperate to not let him go up there!!!

Ahh, that was a sight for gods, I almost thought that they was going to make a new movie about it ;-)

Come to think about it, maybe there is a movie about it somewhere, there is a lot of people with videocameras sneaking around everywhere nowadays… Probably we are just now shown in Japan somewhere…

Of course, my only concern was that Mr Lifecruiser would fall off the train and hurt him self. I mean, if so, who would carrie all my luggage for the rest of the trips? A wife always have to think practical.

Can you please recommend any sort of retreatment for this bad behaviour from him? Ehh.. I mean them…?

Finally, even we will write something about the Katrina disaster. It is so hard to get the words come out right. There is no proper way to say anything on the subject other than that we all feels the pain with the victims.

How ever, there is something we have missed in all the writing out there on the internet and that is mentioning of the other victims, the animals. They too suffer in this mess.

So we will instead urge you all to donate some money to save some of this equally innocent victims.