lifecruiser.org

I think I’ve become an ugly, dirty and unattractive poker widow.

The other day Mr Lifecruiser missed a very crucial thing. This looks very serious for our continued marriage. He was playing poker online out on the internet at the time of the crime.

We were talking about something obviously very important (and intelligent for sure) and I sort of wanted to make my point a little bit stronger, draw a b o t t o m line… So I did one of my favourite things: down with the pants and did the mooning. Waiting for the nice reaction of this normally very popular behaviour.

Nada! Nix, not a twinkle, not even a spank on the butt, nothing! What happened??!!! He didn’t even see it, he was so hooked up at the poker game….. At least he claims that it was the fact, but I wonder….?

Now there is this questions that pops up in my mind… Is he seriously ill? Because this have never happened before. Or have I suddenly become so very unattractive? Maybe I should go and scare someone else, just to test it?! The woman flasher…?

Hey… This could be really fun!

I could go around and scare a lot of people, in high positions too! I use to be full of energy over new projects, so I would probably pop up just about… everywhere… and all the time! No matter if it were at The Swedish Royal Castle or whatever. Mooning The Swedish king, what an honour!

I wonder how long it will take before they come to take me away? And where are they taking me? Can I go to jail for that or will they send me to get some mental care….?

I can se the headlines… *censorship-warnings* Wow, I will be famous!!!!!

Nahh, not my thing, I do NOT want to be famous. And it is very cold outside…

Maybe I have to take that shower after all…?

Royal straight flush vs pair which one do you choose?

Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they will be admitted to Heaven.

Unfortunately, there is only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in.

The Angel asks Dolly if there is some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.

Dolly takes off her top and says, Look at these, they are the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I am sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity.

The Angel thanks Dolly, and asks Her Majesty the same question.

The Queen takes a bottle of Perrier out of her purse, shakes it up, sips some and gargles. Then, she spits into a toilet and pulls the lever.

The Angel says, OK, your Majesty, you may go in.

Dolly is outraged and asks, What was that all about?

I show you two of Gods own perfect creations and you turn me down.

She spits into a commode and she gets in!

Would you explain that to me?

Sorry, Dolly, says the Angel, but even in Heaven, a royal flush beats pair - no matter how big they are…

There have been some really nasty thunderstorm here one night, it went on for several hours and it was raining one day. They said that it was the biggest for a long time now. Of course - I was here with my weather spell on me! *lol*

Other from that it has been quite good weather - if I dare to say that?! We have been taking daily walks an really just relax in the sun.

Went to a couple of shopping centers too, found some jeans and shirts but we are not done with the shopping yet! We must have some more clothes to put on us.

It has been really nice to visit all the relatives here, they all live very well here and are so nice to us. We get spoiled with a lot of good dinners, oh my, maybe we must shop for bigger clothes soon…

Yesterday we went to the Niagara Falls, by bus. They have this good offer, $25 for the trip and then you got a card with $20 to play in the casino and $5 to get some food. There were us and a bunch of oldies. We really did fit in the group…. *not*

We had to go up early in the morning so we did most of our sleep on the bus there. Did see some nice scenery on the way too.

Then we hit the Seneca casino there. That is a big one. Playing around in the Niagara area for sure. Did not win big though, did not play enough we think. You should see the pokerroom there, it was full of players.

The buffet lunch was fantastic, there is nothing to complain about there, so much different food and desserts to choose between!

And the Niagara falls! What can we say other than it was really magificent! Fantastic, some really great falls! It look almost unreal with that big rainbow over it. Maybe the treasure at its end was were the casino was?!

Our only concern was how to be able to take pictures from all angles when it was water dropping from all over. The wind brought a lot of waterdrops like it was raining.

At 56 metres (180 ft) high, the American Falls is slightly higher than its Canadian counterpart. Its crestline is 328 metres (1075 ft) wide. We never went over to the Canadian part which was a pity.

They say that The American Falls look spectacular at night, when it is lit with various combinations of coloured lights, so we want to go there some other time and stay over the night.

So we really recommend to go there, but to stay for a night and even go over to the Canadian side of it. Maybe even take the boat trip to really be able to see it close! That would be something!

Read about Niagara Falls here

In which category do you want to be in? Winner or a looser? Of course you say winner!

Have you thought about what makes you to a winner in poker? If not, I will share some experience I have had at the poker table.

- Play poker is like standing in a queue, you have to wait for your turn if not it could damage for you. So wait for good cards before you make your decision and especially look at your opponents for what kind of draw they are doing.

- When you make a wager at the pre-flop you should be absolutely sure to win the stack. Do not go in and check, it is better to fold the cards in that situation. It cost too much otherwise and you will soon see your stack reduce very fast.

- Let your opponents be them who is wagering in every minute. They will presumably give it to you soon or later, so stand in the queue and wait, the money will come to your stack for sure.

When you play on internet remember a few important things:

- Do not look at TV at the same time it is more then enough with one display, I promise!

- Do not have a couple of children hanging around your legs. It is cute with kids but…

- Do not drink spirits, but you can with advantage enjoy a small beer and black olives………yum-yum…

- Do not argue with your wife/man, it can cost a packet!

At least when you play poker just do that and nothing else, then you can focus at the right thing: to WIN the pot.

If anyone is wondering WHY we are playing around so often at pokersites, here is the answer…. *LOL*

“Several recent studies have shown that mental and physical exercise throughout life may significantly reduce the effects of Alzheimer’s.

Mental exercises such as crossword puzzles, brain teasers, chess, or card games help keep the mind working in top shape. This helps build what is called a cognitive reserve. Formal education also helps build a person’s cognitive reserve. In fact, each year of education reduces a person’s chances of getting Alzheimer’s by an average of 17%. Scientists believe this is because people with a large cognitive reserve are better able to adapt to neurons that are killed by the disease. The more neural connections you have, the longer it takes for the disease to make a significant impact.

It’s important to note that mental exercise cannot do much help once Alzheimer’s has already set in. A person must have a lifetime commitment to learning in order to build up their cognitive reserve. It is probably not possible to completely prevent the disease in genetically susceptible people, but it is possible to delay the onset by long enough that it will not occur in the person’s lifetime”.

[Cut from braingle.com]

  We have been thinking a lot about
  it, trying to figure it out when we
  have been practicing Texas Holdem
  at pokersites. We know how   to loose our money, still learning
  how to keep them and how to get
  them to grow.

The first thing we can see as no pros - is to stay cool, always be calm and wager only with very good cards. We have noticed that the position also has a meaning. We have been bluffing a lot, getting a huge stake, but then lost it the same minute, so we do not recommend that kind of play if you want to let your stake grow.

The best way to earn money playing netpoker is to play tight and we mean really tight. OK, it will take time to earn the big money, but better to be sure then sorry. For us it is entertainment, excitement and the possible chance to bluff at the right time and win the pot. That is really giving us a kick.

Every cent we can win on poker is on the plus account and would be enough for us for the moment. We are still learning and maybe some day even we can live on our pokerplaying.

We will share our experience on the way with you here, so be sure to come back and check out how we are doing. We are going to study the experts really hard and share their experience with you too. So in that sense, you can learn at the same time as we do.

If you have tips and advice – or just want to tell how YOU are doing at the poker table – we are glad to hear from you. The best way is to leave a comment below.

CU on the poker table soon!

We are the best! We are the winners! We got lucky (or was it skill?) at the pokertable again - jippppiiieeee!!!

And another goodie: NO FEE when we made the withdrawal. There is some pokersites we have played at that have been charging us for taking out our money, we do not like that.

We do not understand how they can get away with the fee - no, we will stay away from them, the only way we have to show our big dissatisfaction!!!

We are going to celebrate with some really good stuff, champagne and……..

Let your imagination do the rest!

(ooooh, what are you thinking, you naughty ones….. ;-)

Yes, you read it right! There is some charity to do even when you are playing poker. We really like the fact that while we are playing poker we are actually helping out some less fortunate people.

Even if the pokersite do not have a charityprogram - you can choose by yourself to donate some of the money you win to charity….

Base rule number 1, the most crucial one to your success: Stay cool what ever happens. Keep your poker face on. Play in the same calm, thinking, analyzing way all the time – do not get upset no matter if you are winning or loosing at the moment.

Study your competitors faces, their way to play and specialities in first place and then after that focus on your own hand.

Do not play any games with your behaviour, let the way you play confuse the other players. Do not be predictable, do some different moves and bets.

Adapt your way of playing after the situation and the players skil around the table. It always the same matter of reading the other players. You can not play in the same way against beginners as you do against the more skilful players.

Play very tight in the beginning until you have got some experience – and more money. Then you can afford to start getting more aggressive.

Remember not to fold if you can check.

Study more about poker, learning and practice is always involved in success!

Don’t miss the Poker odds calculator, to see the winning percentage of a hand in Texas Hold’Em or Omaha.